Seeking validation is like saying “tell me who I am, tell me what I am worth.” But it’s hard to stand alone at first I get it. I would be an hypocrite If I told you I was not guilty of it, from time to time. I think we all seek validation in some form or another.
However, as the years go by, the more aware I become the lesser the need for it. I love feedback, don’t get me wrong. It helps us grow and progress. But I believe there comes a point in someone’s life where it should not be a requirement for self-expansion. Actually, if you want to do what you like, you will most likely come to that realization on your own terms at different periods in your life.
There’s a woman in my Facebook contacts who likes to wear subtle glitter on her cheeks. She’s a certain age. Beautiful lady. Not so long ago she wrote on her timeline that a man told her she shouldn’t wear glitter at her age. This what I replied “wear glitter all over your face if you want, who cares.” We had a great laugh. She does not do it in an outrageous way anyway and even if she did, who am I to say she can not do something that brings her joy?
See, that’s the thing with external validation. If it can make you, it can definitely break you. There’s a long list of reasons why it will often most likely bring you down. To keep it short and steady, people are not you and they don’t walk in your shoes. Nobody lives your life. No one but you knows what’s best for you. And a memo for the younger crowd, sometimes your parents don’t always know neither. We hear stories everyday about parents not letting their children be who they want to. Those stories rarely end up well… I think of Leelah Alcorn, for instance. But her story is just one among many others.
The bottom line is, you will never get to realize your full potential if you need external validation to be who you want to be. But here’s the thing. Don’t be mad at people who do not approve of you. Most of us don’t even approve of ourselves. Some people feel limited so they appose limit upon others… Also, with time, I realize we all perceive the world differently and we can’t help but see life through the Eye of self.
For instance, my favorite green is different from your favorite green. Maybe I like dark green, maybe you prefer light green. How do we decide who’s greener? We will most likely never come to an agreement. Maybe you don’t even like green, for that matter… So If a third person asks either one of us which color is the best choice, we will both point to the one we prefer or tell them not to choose green at all.
Hence why I don’t get mad anymore when someone tells me I can’t do something. I understand it is not geared towards me, not even one bit. It tells a whole lot more about who they are than about who I am. If they think they can’t do it, they will obviously tell you it is impossible because they don’t see the picture you see. And that’s the other thing…
Your vision, your intuition, your bliss, or whatever it is, was given only to you to see. In other words, people can’t see what you see, because they don’t have your “vision.” They have a different view. Just be thankful and grateful for your vision, your bliss, your passion. Embrace who you are and the Universe will embrace you. More so, the Universe will send you people to embrace you just like the way you are.
Love yourself. Accept yourself. You truly don’t need nobody’s approval for that. Trust and believe that when you stop seeking external validation, you will attract people and circumstances that will validate you internally. Be in alignment. Stay in alignment. Become aligned with yourself and just watch how fast everything aligns before you.
I wish infinite love, health, healing, wealth, success, happiness, awareness, peace and wisdom upon your soul.